Difference

!

I was dead inside already,I saw him

And got a rebirth

The life already drawn out of my vains

Penetrated into me again.

I saw him and cherished to be alive

For once and a last time in my life

I want to live for me,and only for me!

For me,it’s only him!


Maham

Spontaneous overflow

Growing paler everyday

It’s not age

It’s a loss burdening my soul,

Hardning my face, and vanishing my laugh line

I’m souring like a rotten lemon

Darkening like a fallen leaf

It’s not an age

It’s the the despair sits in my soul

The losses I carry on my shoulder

The damages I m bearing with an iron head

The fragrance of life is gone

The color in eyes are lost

The smile trodden in the season

The soul shattered in the region

Teary eyes turn to sand

Pounding heart to broken lands

Like a ghost in the dark vallies

I wander around in isolation allies!

——

Maham

Story of Safia_______chaptor 1

She wAs born in a village.a village far away from the center of the country,on outskirts of a third world country.she lives in a little countryside where life was quite low standard,low educational institutions,low class community____the people who are either illiterate or half literate, knew little,used to think tighter,in a closely nit conservative society.

She,younger than four kids, was more ambitious,fun loving, passionate than anybody in home.so she was offensively different ,hard to tolerate since her teens.she tried to follow her elder sisters,but always failed.she wanted that privilege and regard her elder sisters owned and getting from parents but was unable as she was younger than them and were delt like youngers,though she didn’t realize that at the time.She always wanted to be one of eldest, privileged, sober and acknowledged.

She got the fairest complexion among her siblings and the most beautiful facial cute features,but she knew about it when she was in grade nine.it was the time when her class fellows started to call her a cute girl.earlier she had been believing herself as the most ugliest creature in the house,may be because she was getting the worst treatment of her parents to in home.of course her parents were poor villagers,not refined people from cultivated,cultured class to lull their kids with love.they were rude and rash to their kids, because they were many,six in a household, resources were limited & responsibilities were huge.so that’s what they were able to offer.

And yes! She was Muslim,born in a Muslim family in a third world Muslim country in South Asia, Pakistan.so when she started her teens life she first time in life came to know that she was cute and lovely ( then why not my parents love me more than the others?????____the first question appeared in her mind with the discovery.of course parents love more to the cute one kid than the others)that was the only thing she could imagine in that little age of twelve.

Her parents were very conservative,ladies and girls stayed inside the four walls of home,away from the out gate.it was boy’s job to open the door for guests.girls were only allowed to talk to the girls in her family.yea,as an exceptional case they can exchange some greetings to boy cousins on Eid days,twice in a year.All the other 363 days they were expected to keep themselves as much out of sight of the boys and men of family and friends as possible.they were picked and dropped to school by father or brothers.she got three brothers and family was strictly following patriarchy.she was rebel so she loved pop music,used to like young pop singers and wanted to live in those melodies and rthymn,though music wasn’t allowed in family especially to girls.she loved having friends,wanted to attend their gathering and meet ups but simply was prohibited of any visit.it made her bitter than everyone in home.she loved her girl friends ( as she was in a girls school so had only girl friends)love the chit chat,and fun with them.and that very thing was so strange to her family.her elder sisters were never inclined to such fantasies.she was getting rebel day by day and family was ready to deal her with a lot of restrictions and exploitation.she has been tagged as Battameez larki (defiant girl) of family.a girl who wasn’t making everyone quite happy with her vibes, wasn’t making up with all expectations.And yes! Her name was Safia!

(to be continued….)

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Maham

I’m from the East!

1_

Where Sun rises

And light spreads its wings around the whole universe

Where a day begins

I’m from that East!

I’m a girl,

That’s not supposed to be

A living being,

My status is less than a chair,a table or a wall

In our homes.

Me,from my birth

Till my death,is a mystery for my people

Not yet revealed!

Let’s see

Who is me!